Spring Break ???

I was sooooooo ready for spring break. I was a zombie-like shadow, powering myself through each workday using I don't know what. After two days of blissful sleep, I go to my first appointment with the gym's personal trainer.

Tanya - if that is her real name - smooth-talked me into ten minutes on a treadmill. Sounded safe enough, I could do that. Little did I know the rapid succession of "only 5 minutes" on three more machines from hell......twice, followed by 10 minutes back on that treadmill. Three times a week???

One of the machines makes me feel like a Kokopelli. Imagine a bicycle without a seat, body hunched over and legs pumping up & down. Who thought of this???? I don't know what its really called, but I call it yagottabekidding.

I actually went back two days later. I hit the yagottabekidding twice, as well as the eliptical, bike and treadmill. I thought it was killing me and I was actively helping. The gym as a form of suicide?

Truthfully, I am half killing myself. I'm killing off half of my weight. I'm killing off the woman who shops in the wide woman department. I'm killing off the only adult I've ever been.

So, what's the other half?